Approach Control

There’s a lot that’s just not under your control. Sometimes the girl stops, sometimes she doesn’t. This is something you need to become comfortable with. The fact that she might not stop.

Anything that makes you feel more comfortable or helps you feel more relaxed is good. Primarily because it’s gonna give you more situational awareness in the moment, so you’ll be able to adapt.


Maybe you’ll notice something about her that you could tease her on, which will change things right off the bat with women. If you’re approaching her, you get talking, compliment her and she’s like “Oh, thanks” and then you tease her on something, you’re flipping the script.

You’re only able to see those sorts of things when you’re relaxed though. Understanding there’s a good chance she will walk off. It’s not more probable, it’s just there’s a good possibility that it’ll happen. That’ll help you out.

Remember, all this is about sustainability and it’s about your lifestyle. It’s about being the kind of guy who is comfortable approaching women for the rest of your life until you get a wife or whatever it is you decide to do.


I liken it to driving to work. You don’t just get in your car and hope that you get there. It’s the same way with women. I’d say being able to meet women is even more important than being able to drive a car.

The reality is just because you know how to drive to work or you know how to drive a car doesn’t mean you’re never going to get a flat. It doesn’t mean you’re not going to hit a snag in traffic. But you are able to drive your car and get to where you need to go. You have that ability for the rest of your life.

That’s all we’re doing here. This is not some magic shit. This is not going to solve all your problems and make you a complete person. This is just a life skill that, as a man with high standards for yourself, you want.

I have high standards for myself in everything. The place I live, the clothes I wear, the people I keep company and the women in my life.

I have to work hard, make sure that everything I do is quality. In the same sense, if I want awesome women in my life, then this is what I need to do. I treat it as a basic life skill.


When I say basic life skills, I mean I think this is something that every guy should know, but very few guys do.

You’re just developing a skill to give you the ability to have what you want. That’s all we’re doing here. That’s why I say you’re just training. You’re training a skill that allows you to talk to that attractive woman. Even if you’re not ready, you’re not dressed well, you’re not in shape, you’re in a crummy mood and the situation is tough.

She’s walking past you or you’re in a café and there’s people around that might hear you and you’re still able to do it. That’s all we’re looking for.


Keeping that in mind, when you’re approaching, you’re going to have situations where it’s out of your control. The girl just doesn’t want to stop. Maybe right off the bat, she looks at you and there’s something about you she doesn’t like. There’s nothing you can do about that.

Nonetheless you do have the ability to stop attractive women. Women that you want to get to know better. Women that you want to sleep with. You have the ability to talk to them during the day and meet them and be able to make a connection. It’s not going to happen every time, but you’re able to do it. Wrapping your mind around that and getting comfortable with that is important.



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