Who To Trust?
A very common thing you will hear from women is that they’ve been hurt by someone in the past.
What you want to do in this situation is flip it. Who cares whether you trust me – the question is, do I trust you?
So, I’ll say, “Yeah, well, trust isn’t earned overnight. I’ve realized that, and I don’t try to make people trust me anymore. I focus on being a trustworthy person. I have no control over whether or not you trust me. All I can do is be my best to be a trustworthy person. Are you the same way?”
I put it on her to be a trustworthy person, and she answers that of course she thinks she’s a trustworthy person. I’ll say, “Yeah, that’s one of the reasons why I asked you out so quickly is just because I feel comfortable around you. And I feel like, for some reason, you’re a very honest person, and you’re trustworthy.”
Now the question is not whether you’re trustworthy. It’s whether or not she is. You’ve set the standards. You’ve told her, I see this in you. I see glimpses of trustworthiness in you. Keep it going. Don’t screw it up. It completely takes her focus off of questioning you, and it’s now about her maintaining your trust in her.
You can do this to help a girl feel comfortable.
If a girl is on the edge or feeling uncomfortable, it’s because she is focused on whether or not she can let go when she’s with you. She has this mentality that she’s a princess, she is the prize and it’s up to you to make her feel comfortable. We don’t like that. We want to flip that.
If the woman is having a hard time relaxing, I would simply tell her that she relaxes me.
I wouldn’t even bring up the fact that she seems nervous. I wouldn’t even mention that. I would say, “There’s something about you, I don’t know, maybe it’s just your attitude, but you seem like you’re an accepting person. I just feel like I can be myself around you. I feel really relaxed around you.”
This will make her relaxed, and it also says this guy feels like he can say anything around me, so it’s safe for me to follow suit and share my thoughts with him.
