Sensual Touch
Let’s say a woman makes a little joke about you. Instead of trying to be witty, or trying to come up with some clever answer – wrap your arms around her and pick her up and squeeze her and shake her. Get her up off her feet and shake her, and it will be like saying she’s a smart ass and you’re just going to shake that out of her.
Make sure you’re very playful with this.
Another way to challenge a woman is to give her a little spanking. Say you ask her to do something, and she forgets to do it or doesn’t do it. Or she’s being a brag – she’s busting your balls or whatever, you give her a little spank.
Another way to do this is to put her wrist behind her back. Take her hand, get behind her, and just hold her hand there behind her back.
All of this is mock rough, mock play, or mock angry. You’re never doing this out of anger – it’s totally playful.
I actually like when women get kind of smart with me – they want to make fun of me or tease me a little bit – because it gives me an opportunity to give her a physical punishment.
Another thing you can do is do what I call “stepping up.” Girls like getting loud or trying to act cocky and you walk up to her and just really close like in her face — nose to nose and chest to chest. You have a playful look on your face challenging her to take it outside.
You’re pretending that you’re going to fight her, but you’re only getting really close. That is really powerful. You actually want to touch your chest to her chest and your stomach to her stomach. You really want to get up close.
That creates a really powerful charge in the interaction. So powerful that you’ll actually feel the urge to back up. But don’t. It will ruin it.
Physically, when a woman does something that is cute, that is something I like, or she tells me something about herself I reward that with physical touch.
These are not things you should just go for out of the blue. There are signals and ways to move into physical touch that you need to be aware of and observe.
The head, neck and face are very vulnerable areas for a person. Also, she puts work into her hair, and you don’t want to mess that up.
Let’s say I’m talking to a woman and she makes a joke. I’ll put my hand on her arm above her elbow briefly as I laugh with her. This says I like that, I like a girl that has a sense of humor.
At some point I’ll say I’m glad I came over and talked to her. I’m having a good time with her. I’ll rub her back very sensually, showing a lot of love through my hand, touching her with appreciation.
Later on in the conversation, maybe I’m talking and she smiled and laughed and her face really lit up. It’s just really pretty to me, so I’ll caress her jaw line and I’ll tell her, “God, I love your smile. You are so pretty.”
That’s an example of how you would escalate, gradually, with touch.
This is very powerful because you’re touching her – which implies that your relationship is a physical one – and yet you’re not even bringing up sex, or giving any reason why you’re touching her.
It communicates that if you keep touching her in this way, you are going to go to bed together. A woman is extremely aware that you’re touching her, but you’re doing it in a natural way that doesn’t create any resistance.
If you think someone has your best interest in mind, you will let them take control of you.
You use the justification that you’re protecting her as a reason to really control her body – moving her body in a direction. Putting your arms around her or guiding her. Opening the door and putting your hand on her back as you guide her through it.
These are all very protective things. You’re taking control of her body. You’re being dominant which means you’re priming her to be submissive. When a woman feels submissive she gets extremely turned on because as human beings our sex is polarized.
When the context has a dominant-submissive dynamic, it will become sexual in both parties’ minds. When you’re in a more dominant role with a woman – say you have women working for you at your job – you’re going to think very sexually about these women because we have this dominance with power.
Consequently, when a woman is submissive to a man in a workplace, or any situation, she immediately starts thinking of him in a sexual way. This is why you see a lot of women that have crushes on their bosses, or men having affairs with their secretaries.
In terms of protective control, one thing you can do is actually talk about this and punishments or rewards.
She will let you have this physical dominance, as long as it’s framed as Protective Control. You’re protecting her. You don’t have to say that — you just do it with your energy. But as long as you’re protecting her as you’re controlling her body, she will let you do it because you are a leader who has her best interest in mind.
You can talk about moving her around, putting her into outfits, putting her into some heels because her legs will look great in them, I would say, “If we went to the park, I would sit you up on that wall with flowers on it and then come up and sit next to you.”
I’m having her picture me picking her up and sitting her down on this wall. And that’s a very dominant thing to do. When I’m taking control of her body, as long as it’s protective she won’t fight it.
Talking about lifting a woman and putting her up on something, or anytime you convey that you will control her body in a loving way is very, very powerful.
I’ll even go so far as to say, “I would love to hold you down and just explore your body with my mouth, find all your little spots.” I’ll say, “Of course, we can’t do that right now, but I’m just letting you know that I was thinking about it.”
I take that pressure out of it. There’s no pressure in it – and this is how I am with sex.
One interesting side effect of being so explorative and curious about a woman and really having that intention of mastering her body from the start is, after a while, you’ll start to really get a strong sense of how to touch a woman.
Where to look, where to kiss, where to touch her. You’ll have stuff that you can say to her that you like doing. If you can get enough experience with women’s bodies at some point, you’ll be in a conversation telling her that you’ve found that you really want to put a woman on her back and lift her legs up and actually, for some reason cross their ankles because you just think that it looks so pretty, that it just makes a woman’s shape look so nice. You really like to just lick up and down the backs of a woman’s legs, and linger on that soft spot behind the knee. Tell her you’ll just suck on that and you bet that it will drive her crazy.
Really get into it, but at the same time no leering. None of this nudge nudge, wink wink, you should do this. You’re just telling her what you like and what you would like to try with her. Send her the message that it will be fun. No pressure.
Sexual tension comes down to talking about your sex and being generally interested in it — you’re talking about your body and being generally interested in hers. You’re using touch as a reward (or as a playful punishment) and then also talking about – and taking – protective control of her body. You’re moving her body around for her own good. All of this is fueled by your genuine love and appreciation of women.
