Intrigue – advanced Dicarlo Drills

Intrigue

A really powerful ingredient you can add to your game is “intrigue.” If you are familiar with the concepts taught at Vin Dicarlo Inc, you’ll recognize this term. It’s like a pull on a woman’s natural curiousity, created by mystery. And mystery is simply a lack of information.

But this concept can be hard to apply for men, because men communicate by exchanging information to solve a problem. So intrigue is completely counterintuitive to most men. Here’s how to add it to your mix.

Natural intrigue

Be lazy. I’m serious. Most people work hard to explain themselves to others, because on a subconscious level, they are trying to get approval. They think that if they can finish their “story” the other person will make a rational decision to approve of them.

That’s not how it works. If you don’t care about explaining yourself, it conveys dominance on a subconscious level. The other person (people) senses this, and falls into line. At this point, they will want YOUR approval, because they perceive you to be more dominant.

Don’t work so hard to make others understand you. Instead, say what you wanna say, and leave details out if you don’t feel like going into them. You’ll find people are naturally  more curious about you and your life!

Structured intrigue

You can add even more intrigue to your interactions by phrasing your words differently. Front-loading emotions, without telling the person WHY they will feel those emotions spikes curiosity in him or her.

“Oh you won’t believe…”
“Guessssss what happened…”
“Wanna hear something crazy?”

These are easy examples. But taking it to another level, you can stop mid-story with phrases like:

“and that’s when it got really wild…”
“I wasn’t ready for what happened next…”
“I shouldn’t even tell you the rest…”

Validation

The most exciting thing to someone is…THEMSELVES. So if the information you leave out (remember the fundamental formula for intrigue) is about the person you are talking to, they will be super interested in what you will say next. Will you validate them, or invalidate them? In other words, does she have your approval or disapproval?

This is actually a great way to open women. Here are some examples of intriguing things you can say when you approach a woman:

“Oh wow. I don’t know what to say…”
“You need to stop that, right now…”
“I’m so mad at you…”
“You are too much…”

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