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The Three Aspects of Awareness (How fear can fuck you up)

“Embrace” is a woman’s sexual nature—like “thrust” is yours—and “brace” is the counterpart to embrace.

Explaining Embrace is like is like trying to explain what makes a man. You could talk for days on end, but what you’re really doing is trying to use words to explain an experience.

A good way to think about embrace is to see it from three different perspectives.

It’s almost like it’s an invisible shape or an invisible cloud. So the way to see it is to shine light on it from different angles. It’s something that is beyond words.

You can’t really see embrace, it’s not tangible. It’s her nature, it’s her energy. It’s who she is at her core.

To have awareness of this invisible essence, I found that it is useful to break it down into three elements. I always use the rule of three, because three is as a self-supporting structure, and it’s the most basic polygon.

Every woman has her unique flavor of femininity. The unique way she expresses embrace, and it’s always made up of the 3 elements of embrace. The 3 elements of embrace are: inspire, nurture, surrender.

Every woman wants to feel sexy. She wants to feel like she evokes desire and passion in a man.

She also wants to nurture. She needs to feel like she contributes something to the relationship, and to the man in her life.

So one of the most powerful things you can say to a woman is “I need your help.”

Very few men ever discover this, and there’s a lot of potential for manipulation once they do. But I found in my personal life, allowing women to contribute is a great way to engage her romantically and sexually.

If she’s giving me a blowjob, she’s helping me relax. When I’m fucking her, she’s taking care of me. I’m inside of her, and she’s embracing me.

Women like it when men use their bodies for enjoyment. To take your pleasure from her. As a man you need to release, you need to have an orgasm and relax.

Knowing that she’s a means for you to do that is very exciting for her. She feels like a woman when she pleasures you.

She inspired your thrust. She inspired your passion. Every woman wants that. David [X] once said something great on the topic: “The man says I want you, the woman says I want you to want me.”

So when you’re inside of her, fucking her, whisper in her ear “you turn me on so much, you’re such a sexy woman,” as you’re thrusting your cock up into her.

Try it next time you sleep with a woman. You’ll see that she will moan, scratch your back, and pull you closer because you’re giving the moment meaning.

You’re verbalizing that she has inspired you, she nurtures you, she surrenders to you.

By verbalizing that, you basically make the act a means for her to feel like the woman she wants to be.

So it’s not just you going in and out of her. When you put your dick inside of her, it’s because she inspires you. Because she nurtures you. Because she surrenders to you. That’s the meaning, revealing our inner selves to each other.

The idea is that you both feel like your true selves when you’re together. And your true self is your best self.

The man you want to be is who you really are. It’s the same with her. The woman she wants to be is who she really is.

It’s fear that gets in the way. We deceive ourselves into thinking we’re not enough, and then we deceive others.

That’s how I:PA*CE – by eliminating deception – naturally elicits that feeling of being your true self and allowing her to feel that as well.

So when you have sex it’s a part of that process of revealing yourselves to each other.

If you can do this, she’s going to be fully satisfied sexually and at no point will you need to make false promises about the relationship.

She’s still getting what she wants. In fact, she getting what she wants more so with you than with any other guy she’s ever dated, or any other guy she will date.

Women will be extremely devoted to you, and you don’t have pretend to be her boyfriend just so that you can fuck her. Be honest about what you want, and she will respect that honesty.

She may even throw a hissy fit here and there but ultimately, she will respect you for being honest.

She feels safer with me than she does with the guy who takes her out to dinner and pretends that he wants to be her boyfriend.

First of all, she can probably feel that. Not to mention, ten other guys have done that in the past. Once they fucked her, they stopped talking to her after five dinner dates.

I personally don’t understand it. Just go get a prostitute. Women have all experienced the pump and dump. The hit it and quit it. They’ve experienced it so many times before they meet you.

So you think you’re this hero coming in and you’re buying her dinner. That’s really the quickest way to trigger her suspicion and her paranoia, because she has seen it before.

Even if your intentions are good. She’s seen guys do the same thing, and their intentions were not good. So immediately she associates you with all the other guys who bought her dinner, only to fuck her and never call her back.

It triggers her suspicions, and it should, because if someone just came up to me and wanted to buy me dinner I’d be thinking what’s the agenda here?

They know what the agenda is: sex.

Even young girls know. Girls know that that’s what boys are all about. Guys are all about getting laid.

Of course, there’s nothing wrong with trying to get laid. It only becomes a problem when you try to pretend that that’s not what you want.

What you want is to buy her dinner because you like her so much. Be who you are. If you’re sexual, be that guy openly.

But also connect with her emotionally and make her feel like the woman she wants to be. Women feel nervous around nice guys because it’s hard to know what they want. They feel comfortable and safe with men who are very openly sexual, because they are open about it.

ME Conversation

I:PA*CE Leads to an intuitive sense of each unique woman

(ME Questions & Statements)

E. stands for mental experience.

You want to ask mental experience questions. She says she’s a nurse, you ask her what it’s like being a nurse. It’s really that simple.

These kinds of questions generate huge, in depth answers where people are really explaining themselves and really trying to show you who they are as a person.

When you ask someone a mental experience question, what you get is them showing you themselves.

Let’s do some examples:

If a girl says she was just messing around on Facebook for a couple of hours earlier. The ME question in that context would be: “What do you like about Facebook?” Or “Why do you use Facebook so much? What do you get out of it?”

Another more specific example could be, “What’s your criterion for adding friends to your Facebook?” Or “What’s the first thing you want people to see when they look at your Facebook page?” All these questions are going to get her to reveal her mental experience. Her ME, who she is.

The last thing is Statements.

This is easy. Following questions, make ME statements, Mental Experience statements.

When I’m talking, I have a habit of thinking more about how I think about things rather than the things themselves. I don’t focus too much on facts, but I focus on my feelings and talk about them. I’ll say, “Yeah, this happens, and I was like this, and I was thinking this, and I said this. Then this person did this, and it made me think this, or it reminded me of this.”

Everything I’m sharing, everything I’m talking about, is about my mental thought about the experience.

When you do this, it makes it safe for the woman to do the same thing in return. She sees that you’re being honest, expressing yourself, not worried about trying to impress her, not trying to put up a persona.

She feels free sharing her ME, her mental experience. She’ll do that, and then you’ll reward her.

Most guys wouldn’t ask a woman to get them a drink or when they do go up to a woman, the first thing they do won’t be to have her do something for them. Usually, it’s the woman asking if you are going to buy her a drink.

You want to reverse that.

Even though it’s kind of a cliché at this point, it still happens. What you’re doing is you’re flipping the script. You will go to a woman and actually use her beauty, her physical beauty not as a reason to put her on a pedestal, but as a tool that you can use for your own benefit.

I would go up to a woman and say, “You’re such a cutie, I bet you’re going to get served way faster than I would up at this bar. Would you grab me a water?”

If the bartender is a guy, I’ll say, “This guy is not going to wait on me. Why don’t you use your feminine charm to get me a water, would you please?” She gets me a water, and I say, “Thank you, sweetie. What’s your name?” I will reward her for her effort.

She gives me her name. I respond with my name and I ask a simple question like, “How is your night going?” She says something, and I ask a ME question. She says her ME. I reward her with touch. I make a ME statement. She sees that it is safe to make an even bigger ME statement where she can really talk about herself. She does so, and I reward. I take the touch to another level, or logistics, or whatever feels natural.

Meaningful Love-making (Make her love your c*ck)

I:PA*CE Creates Meaningful Love-making

The most powerful thing that I teach is creating meaning – it’s what makes sex, not just pleasurable, but worthwhile to a woman.

She needs more than just a physical sensation. she wants to be engaged mentally and emotionally. A very direct, effective activity to try this out is with oral sex. When she’s pleasuring you, that is an opportunity to create meaning.

To teach guys what I mean I demonstrate a sequence that leads into a blowjob. Once you internalize I:PA*CE, you don’t think about any steps or sequences.

But to get started, I use this sequence so guys can quickly apply it and see instant, real world results.

They are always amazed at how much the woman actually starts to love and crave their cock. It becomes a symbol of much more—it has meaning. If you like blowjobs this is something you should learn, because it makes it really exciting for the woman too.

Blowjobs are something that I’ve always really enjoyed with women. So I wanted to go all the way with it—really make it as enjoyable and intimate as possible.

As I was learning and trying things, I came up with this sequence that I now offer lessons on.

Again, I don’t think about it now —I am just fully engaged, having this very primal-yet-spiritual conversation with the woman—my dick, her mouth, and us “talking” in a language beyond words.

I’m making her feel like the inspiring, nurturing, tender, yet strong woman she really is, and she’s making me feel like the throbbing, striving, hard, aggressive, yet vulnerable, naked man I really am.

It’s amazing, and usually leads to incredibly connected, passionate sex. But a lot of times, we are enjoying it so much that she finishes me off and is more satisfied that way. Because of the meaning, the connection, the conversation beyond words, where my pure masculine essence dances with her feminine essence.

The dance is like a spiral of control-exchange.

Think about when we play video games as men. Who are the video game protagonists? They’re always warrior-type, super-strong, confident, tough guys.

You think about the characters in Modern Warfare or Call of Duty and there’s always this chiselled, handsome, super-built fearless guy.

You’re him for a time. Just turn on the Xbox and you get to be him—the man you want to be. A hero.

This is part of the appeal of the video game. There’s the problem-solving element. There’s the adventure of shooting enemies, but most importantly you get to be this bad ass hero for a few hours.

It’s the same with woman. When she’s riding your dick, when she’s sucking your dick, when she’s being kissed by you, touched the you. She feels sexy.

This comes back to inspire, nurture, and surrender. Which are the three core aspects of a woman’s nature.

Be Your Own Man

We’re talking about purpose and what purpose really means and how you want to align or streamline the man you want to be and fit women into that so it’s all aligned.

For a lot of guys, they have their job, they have their hobbies, they have their friends and then there’s girls. And the girl thing is almost like this part time job they have.

It’s going out, it’s figuring out ways to talk to girls. Like how to have conversations with women. How to act with women. Even the clothes you wear to go out in. They’re different from how you would normally dress if you’re just hanging out.

The problem is guys have their lifestyle and they’re fitting women into or around it that rather than having a lifestyle inclusive of women.

It makes everything harder because it’s like you’re doing a second job. It also makes things harder because you have to think more. You have to think about more stuff. Especially if you’re a guy who really wants to be good with women but you don’t have a lot of time for it.

It’s been said to me time and again that I should concentrate on finding a way for guys to achieve this while they are still working a lot. They say they don’t have time to do all the exercises and read and absorb all the material.

And so everything I do is pointing in that direction. These are serious guys that have real goals that are not trying to make picking up girls the centre of their lives. So we’re talking about purpose and understanding what you value.

A lot of it is just about efficiency and about making your life easier, more streamlined, more efficient, so that you can get those elite results with women without having to spend a ton of straining mentally or going out.

You know what I mean. You’re going about your day and then you’re at a bar and there’s this girl you want to talk to. Immediately it’s like this whole new train of thought.

“What do I say?”

You’re trying to figure her out.

“Does she have a boyfriend? Who’s she with? What’s her mood? Is she approachable? Is she pretty enough?”

That’s something that I think about. I have to make sure that she’s at least a girl that I’m going to be really passionate about. So you’re instantly running through all these other questions. Fitting that into the big picture is really important.

Stepping back and saying “Okay, what kind of man am I becoming?”

So that you’re that way when you’re working you’re the same as when you’re chilling. And you’re also the same way when you’re with women. You don’t have to change. You don’t have to think about anything extra, you’re just you and it turns women on.

How To Understand A Woman

Actively listening makes you so attractive to a women. As she talks, she invests in you. You become bigger in her mind. More trustworthy.

She has to justify all this effort she’s making by telling herself this guy is great. This is a cool guy. He is confident, and he is interested in me. All these things that she wants to believe about you, she will convince herself are true.

From start to finish, you want your whole conversational structure based not on what you’re saying, but based on getting her to say things. This is my whole perception of conversations when I deal with women; this is my whole game right here. Getting them to express themselves, and then I reward her with me.

You can reward with some kind of touch, or just more of your attention. Or by letting her know that you think she’s cool and you’d like to see her again by asking for her number.

Use your three tools:

Set an example by making statements.
Ask questions
Shut up.

It’s an all-pervasive attitude of drawing her out. Focus on getting to know her.

That focus manifests in many ways. It could manifest with getting her to buy you a drink, her taking your number and calling you versus the other way around, her driving out of her way to come see you, buying you things, or her cooking you dinner. All these things are just examples of a myriad of ways that this drawing-out focus manifests itself.

Whether it’s her sense of humor or her intelligence or her nurturing, caring side, whatever kind of person she is, you want to get her expressing it to you as much as possible.

This is your all-pervasive attitude with a woman. ⁭If you’re the prize, if you’re the man, If you’re the trophy, the one of value in a relationship, then your focus should be on getting her contribution, getting her to earn you, to work for you.

A great way this can be achieved is through comfortable silences.

There are two main modes in conversation; asking questions, and making statements.

Then there are Comfortable Silences. Journalists will do this when they are interviewing someone. If they ask a question and the answer they get isn’t sufficient, they will just let it hang there. People want to fill that silence.

A lot of times it can be good, if you can’t think of anything to say to just not try to think of anything to say. You’re not trying to work for her, let her fill the silence.

Just lean back, relax, and don’t say anything. You’re comfortable with the silence. She will feel the social tension and she will fill it in.

By allowing silences, you create a scenario where she will fill in that silence, therefore becoming more invested in your interaction.

What Does Sex Really Mean?

(How I:PA*CE helps you understand female sexuality)

Makes you good in bed. *** 10, if expanded/juiced a little more

– Need a story

I:PA*CE can help you determine a woman’s identity. How she self-identifies.

That’s extremely important when it comes to creating meaningful sex. If you can understand who she wants to be, you can use sex as a means for her to feel like that.

You want to empower her sexually, which will make her crave sex with you. The irony is guys are afraid to empower women sexually, because they secretly fear that once a woman has a choice, she won’t choose anything less than an alpha male.

But that’s not how women choose. Women choose men who make them feel like a sexy diva, a submissive kitten, whatever she’s into.

Underlying what specifically turns her on is her arousal from feeling desired. All of this can be achieved through I:PA*CE.

What do you mean? What’s so important about creating meaning?

Essentially, when it comes to sex itself, it’s the meaning behind the act that turns women on.

Think about romance novels, I think everyone can agree that a romance novel is like women’s porn. That’s the one thing that gets all women wet.

And what is a romance novel? It’s a story.

So when the woman has sex with the dashing highlander rogue, it’s not just the act itself that turns her on.

See, as men we don’t understand, because we watch porn to get ourselves off. It just starts right at the action. She’s naked, she’s getting fucked and that’s good for us.

But for the women, it’s the build up to the act. This mysterious guy, he’s hard to reach, he just does whatever he wants.

He pisses her off but she’s still drawn to him. He’s mysterious and over time she unravels his personality, his story, his background, his history.

What makes him so mysterious, dark, and tough are all the things he’s been through. What he’s true secret vision is. What he’s really up to.

She learns all these things and then they’re on the bearskin rug having sex.

At that point it’s the same act as in a porno. Your dick is going in and out of this women.

But in a romance novel there’s a story behind it. There’s a story leading up to it. So she’s not just fucking an anonymous dick. She’s fucking a man with a story, with a history.

He resonates emotionally with her as a woman.

So when you’re talking about sex having meaning it sounds like a conflict. If sex has meaning that means it’s going somewhere; somewhere long term.

Meaningful sex doesn’t mean the relationship is “going somewhere.” That’s a huge misconception.

Another common misconception is that women think they are the sexual prize, and when they resist or aren’t super eager to get with you it’s because they think they are too good.

More often than not it’s that they are afraid. They have fears men don’t have, but they can’t openly discuss those fears with a guy they just met.

In The Hite Report (A study on female sexuality) women state that they “want meaningful sex.”

It was also found that women all say they are open to casual sex, to sleeping with men, or they’ve “had some adventures before but I want sex to have meaning.”

They say meaningful sex and as men we assume that means lovey dovey.

We’re having sex because I love you, we’re having sex because we’re boyfriend and girlfriend now. We’re having sex now because I’m committed to you and I want to be in an exclusive relationship with you long term.

That’s not what women mean at all.

For them, meaningful means a man and woman connecting deeper by revealing their inner selves to each other.

That’s the fundamental desire. The inner self being revealed mutually through sex.

That means you can have a casual sexual partner, a lover, or just a woman that you sleep with.

You can have a woman that you’re friends with, and you guys just hang out and have passionate fun sex together without needing that long-term exclusive commitment.

You can do this because she’s still satisfied. She’s still enjoying it. She’s getting what she needs, which is meaning, without you having to pretend that you want to be in relationship with her.

If you understand what “meaning” is, if you understand what they really mean by meaningful sex then you can satisfy that need directly without making false promises about the future.

If she likes you a lot she’s going to want to see more of you. That just comes with the territory. You can fight that, you just have to be responsible about it.

It’s a quality problem. Women just love you too much.

That’s a real thing that can happen to you. Women are going to be crazy about you. Just by creating meaning sexually through the things you say to her as you’re kissing her, as you’re touching her, as you’re becoming more intimate.

Energy Approach

To approach a woman when you’re nervous takes a lot of willpower because you’re forcing yourself to do something that you’re worried is going to be painful. If you do that six times in a row, your willpower’s going to be completely depleted. You need to replenish your energy reserves.

Make sure you get plenty of low GI wholegrain carbs ahead of time and keep yourself replenished as you go because if you don’t you’re just going to burn out.

You’re making yourself do things you don’t want to do. It’s exhausting. I know about this intimately because working from home, at any moment, there are ten thousand different ways I could distract myself from work. So all day, it’s me saying “No I need to concentrate on work, on what i’m doing here right now.”

There’s a great quote from Lombardi: “Fatigue makes cowards of us all.”

To have courage to do the things that you’re afraid to do, if you’re tired, it’s just impossible. You’re just not going to be able to do it. You need energy.

As you push through this gets easier. The idea of approaching women is not so scary anymore. You don’t have to will yourself to do it as much any more. And because it’s easier, you don’t get as tired. This part of improving yourself is the hardest, but you have to push through.

Make Her Happy

How you feel about yourself is more valuable than any money or material possession

If you can get a woman to feel happy around you, she’ll do anything for you because there’s nothing compared to the happiness she’s got with you.

She’ll buy you something, or do something for you, or drive you around, or do whatever the fuck you want because she feels happy around you, and that completely overshadows any materialistic endeavor she could have towards you.

What makes a person want to be around someone else in order to feel happy? You have to feel like you can be yourself around them.

I’ve known people who I admired, respected, and looked up to, but when I was around them, I felt really nervous and actually didn’t want to be around them. Maybe I want to learn something from them, or get something from them, or I wanted their approval. But I definitely did not want to just hang around with them. I didn’t feel good about myself around them. I felt inferior.

If you want people to be happy and feel good around you (and believe me, you do) you have to create a relational dynamic within which she feels happy around you and validated by you.

The times that we feel the most happy are when we feel like we can be our true selves. We can say exactly what’s on our minds. We can relax around people, knowing that whatever silly joke or stupid comment we make is not going to be ridiculed, and it’s not going to get us ostracized, isolated or rejected. It’s just going to be accepted and responded to.

Think about the way you interact with your close friends who’ve known you for years. They think that you’re a cool person, they like you and appreciate you. You can crack a stupid joke. You don’t always have to say witty, interesting things. You can just be your same, boring, normal self, and they still love, accept, and appreciate you.

That’s the dynamic you want with women.

If she feels like she can be her true self without putting up any front, any persona, any act, any effort, and still be appreciated and accepted by you, she will feel happy when she’s with you.

I:PA*CE Escalation

Allows FAST escalation. ***10

I:PA*CE is how to touch a woman. I:PA*CE is how to kiss a woman. I:PA*CE is how to talk to a woman. I:PA*CE is how to fuck a woman.

Keep the order in mind. You elicit the woman’s value, elicit her personality, and elicit her sexiness through I:PA*CE. Then you reward her through I:PA*CE.

Whether in a conversation or before you’ve even talked to her, she observes you talking to other people and sees that you’re a leader.

In keeping that order in mind, where the woman maybe makes an effort or does something to get your interest or get your attention, you will learn to escalate more quickly.

I:PA*CE Escalation 2

Convo, touch, logistics, sex, relationship, harem management – all I:PA*CE in context. No extra tactics or thought. All aligned and streamlined. ** yea, streamlined and aligned, ‘structural integrity’ ‘system integrity’ 9. No need for extra skill set. ACT via I:PA*CE deos it all. SS covers everything. It will prep you for training, or be a great follow up.

There’s a lot of ideas out there about how to touch women. Stuff like games you can play with women. Thumb wars is one, which I used to do a lot when I was younger.

These types of games are excuses to get physical with a woman. I’ve seen a lot of similar methods that try to show you different techniques to touch a woman, but a technique is not a system. Having a method for touching women is going to make your touches feel strange.

Women can feel that dishonesty. They can feel the awkwardness in your touch. They’re very sensitive to that.

Also, if you’re thinking about what you need to say and you’re also thinking about how touch a woman, you’re using your energy thinking about two things. That’s going to get in your way.

You shouldn’t be thinking about two different things when you’re talking to a woman. I:PA*CE allows you to touch her naturally and confidently.

Your hands, for example, can express appreciation.

I used to use the DiCarlo Escalation Ladder. First you touch her arm, then you touch her back, then you touch her hair and neck area.

But I’ve since found that that order is completely unnecessary. I can touch her hair if I want to. I can touch her back right away. I can touch a woman anywhere.

It’s been well established that I like women with nice asses. What I’ll do a lot is I’ll actually tell her “Wow, I love your butt. Let me squeeze it?” and I’ll turn her around and squeeze her butt. I was demonstrating this in Las Vegas a few months ago and I did it to at least 4 women in a row.

I got a couple numbers, and could have taken one home but I was running a program and needed sleep. I saw her before she left town though.

Now, that’s Vegas. I don’t advocate anyone trying that. You have to be in the zone, having a great time, and totally congruent. But I:PA*CE will get you to that point.

That just shows you, if your touch is coming from the right place—in other words I:PA*CE—you can do the same thing.

You can leap ahead. You don’t have to go through this boring courting process, or the escalation phases. You don’t have to do any of that.

Instead of trying to use a one size fits all approach with women you’ll see the opportunity to escalate, you’ll do it, and she will enjoy it because it’s coming from the right place.

Approach Mindset Exercise

I want you to just sit in a high traffic area and approach a girl that you like the look of. You’re going to notice the conscious things she did as far as her fashion and you’re going to give her a specific compliment about how it makes her more beautiful.

So take a day, sit there for like 10 or 15 minutes until you get your mind in that zone where you’re noticing those things.

And then approach three women with that compliment. In this case, you’re not going to run up to them. You’re not going to run up and say “Those earrings look great on you.”

That doesn’t really make a lot of sense, that might look like you’re some kind of fashion person. What you’re going to do instead is notice this about women who are moving slower or more stationary.

Maybe you come to an intersection together. Women who are sitting in the park, who are sitting in a café, especially women who are sitting outside.

This exercise will give you more flexibility in your openings. It will help you alleviate some of the anxiety of the approach.

You’re saying the same thing over and over because you’re still nervous. You haven’t done enough. You aren’t pushing yourself when it sucks. When you do that, you will reduce your anxiety and that’s when you’ll be able to think of something creative, something relevant to the moment on your feet.

You’ll start to be able to say just the right thing at the right moment. It’s very intuitive. There’s no formula for having a good way to approach a woman. Once you get to a certain level, it’s intuitive and this exercise will help develop that intuition.

You’re practicing mindset. That’s when it sucks. You’re noticing conscious decisions she made to be more beautiful and you’re using that to approach her and show sexual interest in an appreciative but less intense way.

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