If you know how to turn a girl on, you can sleep with her, and make her your girlfriend if you want. It doesn’t matter how hot she is. Most women have the same emotional and physical needs. When you indicate that you can satisfy those needs to a woman, she will want to spend time with you and be intimate with you.
So what do women want from men? Fundamentally, a woman wants to feel desired by a man. Other factors like financial success, good looks, and a sense of humor can help, but only if there is a foundation of sexual chemistry first.
Some men know how to create sexual chemistry consistently with women, but they usually do it intuitively and can’t articulate exactly what the process is (or they just don’t want to share).
If you don’t know how to turn a girl on, nothing you have or do will make a difference. She won’t sleep with you.
If you constantly get “friend zoned” by girls, while they choose other guys, then you don’t know how to turn a girl on. Because of this, your conversations with beautiful women will feel boring and dry.
Most guys get nervous around beautiful women. This is normal. But if you get so nervous that you can’t think clearly, or make a move when the time is right, you will end up losing the girl to another guy. I guarantee there have been MANY women who would have slept with you, but you missed out because you never made a move.
In fact, I’d venture to say that most men COULD have tens times as many women than they do.
Girls know how to turn guys on, but most guys don’t know to turn a girl on. Guys will pretend to be confident, try to be funny, brag, or be “smooth” in the hoping to turn a girl on. As men, we intuitively know that it’s your personality, your mind, that attracts or repels a woman. But a woman can tell if you are trying to impress her, or you are faking your personality to appear smarter/cooler/funnier than you actually are.
This is how most men try to turn girls on, but ironically, this is the WORST thing you can do, because it tells her that you are BAD IN BED. Female sexuality is totally misunderstood. Women are surprisingly simple (and horny). The reason why most guys don’t know how to turn a girl on is because they don’t understand women.
The first order of business to learning how to turn a girl on is to fix your beliefs about women. Think about what you want to do to a beautiful woman. You want to touch her, fuck her, watch and feel her suck your dick. That’s GOOD. She wants to do that stuff too. You must believe this. Read Nancy Friday’s “My Secret Garden” and “The Hite Report,” to internalize women’s inherent sexuality. You’ll be absolutely shocked. Society and girls themselves do just about everything in their power to hide it – but women are absolutely crazy about sex.
If you feel like you are getting over on a woman by sleeping with her, you will struggle and fail hard. By trying to get sex from her, by undermining her innate sexuality, and instead using game you are telling her that you are in the frame of women=possessions, and thus her value diminishes if she fucks youYou must feel like you are giving them a good experience. You must be proud of your dick. women like your body – your hands, your mouth, and especially your dick. If you think you are sneaking a dirty part of your body into women, you must change this by reminding yourself that women love dick, and that part of YOU, is designed to pleasure HER.
What helps men and women get together is right by nature. Nature is life supporting. When you do things that lead to you getting with women, you are aligned with nature. Unfortunately, game often prevents or slows down the sexual process. When you drop game, and do what comes natural, while OWNING it, you will turn girls on.
If you get your body, style, and hair and facial hair style together, you will be good-looking enough. Once you do, simply wanting a girl makes you valuable to her. She wants to get fucked. Women want men to desire them. Your desire IS your value.
Your desire is your value, once you handle the basics of grooming and fashion, decent fitness, a job, goals, and a stable living situation.
Women can sense a man’s sexual power INSTANTLY. It’s been proven scientifically that women subconsciously decide if they would sleep with a man within seconds of meeting him. If it’s a “no” then it’s very hard to turn that into a “yes.” So either you turn her on FAST, or you won’t sleep with her…EVER.
As you probably know, guys who have a “natural way” with women aren’t always the smartest, wealthiest, or best-looking…they just know something other guys don’t.
I struggled with women up until my mid-20’s. But several friends of mine got awesome results. And they were not good looking guys, but reasonably cool and fun guys. They would hook up with women they just met without dates or spending money, or trying very hard.
I decided to fix my problem, using seduction techniques, and i met a lot of women, trying a lot of weird techniques.
On dates, I tried to spend little money, as I was broke, and didn’t actually want to date. I wanted sex. I managed to get a fuckbuddy that helped me increase my sexual confidence,
And i started noticing that my escalation was happening faster, showing me that this was something I could learn. I started reading a lot of books on female psychology, and started realizing that women like sex too.
I noticed that the more money I spent, the less likely a woman was to sleep with me. The faster I got a woman to my place, the faster we’d have sex. Often women would say they were “being good” and weren’t going to sleep with me.
I would just keep talking and touching, going in for the kiss, escalating as far as the woman would let me.
I found that it wasn’t women who were afraid of sex, it was me. Often I would realize after the fact that I could have made a move, that she was open, probably horny, and it was my fear of doing the wrong thing or coming off creepy that was holding me back, on top of my lack of sexual confidence from real experience, which was changing with the couple FBs i had
I also realized that it was being sweet, chivalrous – paying for shit basically, being a gentleman and not being sexual out of “respect.” On dates, women would be more hesitant to come over, and not call back afterwards.
This started a journey that is too long and complex to go into, but over the past 8 years I’ve been moving more away from courtship and more towards friendship which may sound weird bc of the friendzone, but i am friends with women and fuck them and it works out very well – the sex is better, we are more open and honest outside the bedroom, and i feel a real connection, not another conquest. Of course i’m not monogamous and they know this -sometimes they get mad, but quickly get over it because they miss the sex, the bond, and having a strong, smart, sexy man they can be themselves with, and it’s appreciated and encouraged.
Girls are not machines that you put kindness coins into until sex falls out.
A woman will have sex with you if she thinks she will enjoy it, not because you are handsome, funny, or rich. As you are turned on by a woman’s body, she is turned on by your mind. How a man thinks determines his success, quality of life, and how he makes others feel. Your ability to satisfy a woman in bed depends not on your size, stamina, or technique, but how you express your thoughts about her. Women intuit this from the moment they meet you.
Making a woman horny is not a random, complicated, or mysterious process. It’s not a process at all. Women are already horny, just as you are already horny. You don’t walk around with a hard-on all day, but you have a baseline sexual desire, naturally inherent to you, and all healthy humans, including women.
There is a general misconception that women are less sexual and horny than men. Many men accept this idea, despite a mountain of evidence supporting it’s antithesis. Sadly, the study of female sexuality is still in its infancy. But over it’s short life-span, serious inquiry into female sexuality has overturned many paradigms, assumed and accepted without any academic rigor critical analysis supporting them.
Here are some myths about female sexuality (with links to articles disproving them):
Women have sex in return for commitment and resources (instead of pure pleasure).
The fundamental problem is miscommunication and misunderstanding, stemming from Confirmation Bias, Conservatism Bias and Social Desirability Bias. Conventional wisdom AND science have both failed women, and in doing so, failed men, who remain in the dark and thus sexually frustrated
Several factors create the illusion of the asexual female:
1. A woman’s value as a human being is determined by how few sexual partners she has had. If she is judged as promiscuous, or “easy” (as if she is weak foe in a battle), she loses social value. So even though she is horny, she must hide this from society, from any man she likes, and from herself, by detaching from her sexuality, and repressing sexual thoughts as they only serve to frustrate her in a world that punishes female desire. She feels horny, but must hide it.
2. All women have experienced sexual trauma. It’s common for a woman to have been molested, raped, or nearly raped at least once in her life. I don’t know one woman without a disturbing experience. In general, women are leered at, here vulgar comments from strange men, and groped. Every woman has felt pressure to have sex before she is ready, by a guy she thought liked and cared about her. In high school, and even college, if a woman has sex with a guy, he will brag (or word will somehow get out) and she will gain a reputation as a slut, as easy, as dirty…for doing something she is wired to do, that felt good, and was a way to feel closer to a guy she liked and thought liked her. You may not have known about these COMMON female experiences, but you can understand why women are bit apprehensive about getting alone with a guy they just met, and tend to put the breaks on throughout the sexual process.
3. As the gender investing more in reproduction, women see sex more like an investment. The risk is getting impregnated by a man who will disappear after he gets what he wants. The baby grows inside her body, not yours. That’s a big deal, but it also illustrates how horny women are. They still have sex despite the risk. I wonder if men would be a little more cautious about jumping in bed with a woman if there was a 50% chance of the man getting pregnant.
4. Most men are BAD in bed, according to what I’ve been told by every woman I’ve asked (a lot). This is because men don’t understand what turns a woman on. It’s not what you see in porn. Do women like to be fucked, pounded, spanked, choked, and slapped? Yes to all, but only if done in the right way, and only in conjunction with other aspects of sex, which I will explain. If you’ve never had sushi, and someone offers to buy you a sushi dinner, you won’t be that excited, even if though the meal is free. But once you have sushi, and you like it, sushi becomes more tempting. In her mind, the odds that sex with you will be worth the time, logistical complications are not great.
This is what you are facing when you meet a new woman you want to sleep with. Combine her sexual cynicism with the first 3 factors, and you have a situation requiring YOU to communicate that she will LOVE getting fucked by you.
Women want sex just as much, if not more, than men. But they have a dimension of anxiety in their sexuality that men don’t have. This anxiety is perceived as disinterest, so men use tricks (seduction), bartering (paying for dates), and even force (rape, or emotional manipulation) to GET sex FROM her body, in SPITE of her mind. Ironically, they are waging battle against a foe – her disinterest or disliking of sex – that doesn’t exist. In doing so, they ignore the ambiguity of fear and desire women feel about sleeping with a new man.
So a more useful articulation of our goal is to say “how to turn a girl on TO YOU,” and magnifying her arousal that it outweighs her fear. I will give you a general strategy for directing a woman’s innate sexuality towards you, and then give you 3 simple yet powerful tactics to trigger dripping wet lust in the next woman you meet, and a bonus tactic to blow her mind in bed.
It all begins with your desire. Your desire is the key to triggering her desire. But you must convey your desire in a way she understands, while at the same time, not violating too many social conventions. I don’t teach my students to be smooth, because trying to be smooth is like trying to be funny – it ensures you WILL NOT be funny or smooth.
However, when you understand female sexuality, and can communicate your desire for her in subtle ways that resonate with the female mind, you WILL be very charming, confident, and smooth.
For 8 years as a professional dating coach for men, I’ve personally mentored hundreds of men to do the same. Hundreds of men are using my system to live their dream sex life…RIGHT NOW.
If you are reading this, you want to be a better man, and enjoy all that life has to offer. You deserve that. And that’s why I want to help you.
I just finished a 90 minute, 3-part Video program called The Sexual Spark.
This 3 Part Video Series is based off of female psychology, scientific studies, interviews with women, and his own (incredibly successful) experience.
It is based off of my groundbreaking ACT system.
Which stands for:
These may sound like strange words in the context of meeting and sleeping with women, but they are the three PILLARS of dating success. To learn how to turn a girl on and create a Sexual Spark using simple conversation, anytime anywhere, check it out here:
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