I see guys approaching women with a player face all the time. It’s kind of like a look that says yeah, I know what’s up. What’s up girl. I know what I’m doing, I got game.
It’s complete bullshit.
These guys look silly. Guys do this and it’s bad, it’s very bad. It comes from this idea that you need to be more than what you are. You can’t change the value you offer. Sure you want value. Value is why women are turned on by firemen and pure success.
If you have a lot of money – that’s value. You shouldn’t use that to seduce women because that’s corny, but if she meets you and likes you and finds out that you’re making 6 figures and you got a nice car – oh my God that’s totally offering value to her.
But you can’t change that right now talking to her. You can’t make 6 figures right now (unless you already are.) There’s nothing you can do about that.
So you want to be working on your value in your life, but right now there’s nothing you can do to change it immediately. So trying to put on an act as if you’re better than you really are is just a waste of energy. If you do, women can see that you’re acting.
That’s the main thing they’re looking for. They see that you’re acting. Honesty is way more important and honesty is not just in the things you say but it’s in the fact that you went for it. You did approach her. That’s honesty. You wanted to talk to her and you did it, even though you were scared.
That’s honesty in action. That’s courage. Most people succumb to fear and they don’t do what they really want to do. So you’re honest in terms of the fact that you did approach her. You’re honest in how you present yourself, the way you move and your facial expressions.
You’re not trying to look like you’re smooth or a player. Like you have some special knowledge and that makes you better than her.
You don’t have that. Your face is your face and what she see’s is what she gets.
Be honest verbally with what you say as well. Saying things like “Yeah, I don’t even know what I’m saying right now.”
Or I’ve said stuff before like “What’s your name?”
She says “Jenny.”
And I draw a blank and I’m like “I’m pretty sure you just made me forget my name.”
“…Oh wait, yeah, it’s Brian.”
And you’ll get a laugh. Now is that the smoothest, coolest thing you can say? Is she going to see you as this awesome stud?
Probably not, but you don’t need to be all that. She’s going to be thinking Oh, this is an honest guy. And you know what, yeah, maybe he’s a little awkward, but he’s got balls.
That awkwardness shows that you’re real. That’s so much more important to women. I mean, women despise liars. They despise lying men because it’s weak.
That’s where lying comes from. It comes from fear based on the illusion that you’re not good enough. So you don’t have to be smooth or know the right things to say or do it “right.”
For a woman, getting sexual with a guy is about giving up control. That starts when you first meet her. There’s nothing women respect more than honesty. Get some self-effacing banter in there. Some little jokes about yourself. Tell girls that you didn’t plan this.
Say “I’m kinda awkward but I had to go for what I want. If I didn’t, i’d have kicked myself”
When I said that I was kind of looking off into the distance. I was thinking about it in my head.
So then I looked back at her and her eyes are going up and down my body. Now think about that. I’m awkward and I feel awkward and I’m making fun of myself and feeling like a tool. Meanwhile she’s looking me up and down.
You’ll see that, you’ll notice that.
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