In grade school, physical genetics win. Who gets picked for teams at recess determines who is “liked” and respected in class, and after school.
But after grade school, things change.
A new dynamic applies. Being ambitious, and social takes precedence over physique.
Women are drawn to the man in charge. But if you focus on being that guy, you won’t be. It sounds confusing at first, but makes perfect sense.
Let’s start by substituting substitute “dominance” with the word “leadership,” Focusing on leadership will accelerate your learning process and that’s the whole point of LEAD7 – to speed things up and save your time.
From the inside looking out, a leader is focused on resolving conflict, first within himself. But that’s the longest, hardest struggle – to change yourself from within.
The FASTEST way to solve conflict is by getting help from others. Nothing is accomplished alone, and leaders know this.
The way to get help is to first give help. Instead of trying to fix yourself from the inside, look where you can help others, and then take action.
Sitting at home reading books only fuels the idea that you have a problem, thus fueling the problem itself.
All problems exist only in the mind. It is mind’s, perceiving illusory separation, thus conflict, that start war, perpetuate poverty, fuel hatred, racism, oppression, violence. Inner conflict creates depression, insecurity, fear, and anger.
When you ACT (ACT Leadership is the foundation of what I teach), you are DOING love. By doing courage, you inspired others, and bring bring us all closer to freedom.
The best way to achieve your vision is to attract help by first offering help.
That’s what dominance really means, and why I don’t ever say “dominance.” If you are the guy worrying about who’s the “alpha male” or who is more dominant, you are NOT either. You are just another beta monkey fighting other beta monkeys.
Focus on leading others, by helping them see themselves as the Ones they want to be. This means you need vision, like a psychological x-ray vision…we are born with it, then we lose it…gain it back.
Connecting with women means leading women into intimacy. It might mean leading women into an open, polygamous sexual relationships.
Or it might mean finding that special woman and connecting to her deepest dreams and desires, so she will never let you go.
If you want to master this process, I explain everything, from top to bottom, in Sexual Supremacy.
External Cues vs. Internal Processes
Smiling can be DOMINANT, or SUBMISSIVE. The difference is the “why” behind the smile.
When you look happy, people see you as in control of your life. When you are depressed, it looks like life is controlling you.
When you laugh at someone’s joke, even though it wasn’t funny, are you worried about their approval, or are you trying to make them feel confident?
When I tell people I’m a dating coach for men, they always ask me for a piece of advice – what would I tell “guys” or what is it that I teach, in a nutshell. My response is, “don’t try to look confident. Instead, focus on giving confidence to those around you, men and women. Tell women they are beautiful without wanting anything back, without hoping for an outcome.”
This is leadership. You can start tomorrow, simply by focusing on what you like about other people. Some of them may shrug it off, or look at you weird.
If you feel an emotional reaction, that means your intention was impure – you weren’t doing it for the right reason: to give. You were trying to take.
Becoming aware of this process within yourself is the first, but biggest step, in becoming a leader. It starts with you – are you showing the universe who you are – your best self?
or are you hiding and manipulating, to get an outcome you don’t feel you truly deserve?
If you are not sure, take 5 minutes everyday, for a week, to just watch your thoughts, and write down what you mostly think of.
Is it comprised of arguing/fighting fantasies? are you imagining “how to win”? Maybe you regret past failure, or worry about future dilemmas?
If you are concerned about what a female thinks of you, you are basically asking a person with a vagina what you, a man, should do.
It’s a ridiculous idea if you think about it. Would you ask an auto-mechanic how diversify your portfolio? Would you ask the grocery clerk how to design your website?
Only YOU can decide what is the right action. Substitute “right” with “your.” What is YOUR action?
How will you help others?
How will you ENJOY being YOU?
Once you have a Vision for yourself, and thus a positive motive for meeting others, connecting with women will be as easy as making breakfast, driving yourself to work in the morning, or talking to a friend at the end of the day.
It can be easy, as easy as you can make it.
It’s up to you. Women are out there – a lot of them…a lot of beautiful, caring, passionate, interesting, fun women.
Enjoy them! Meeting women should be fun, not a strategic war to get in her pants.
Forget the silly nice guy vs. jerk debate, and stop worrying about who is “alpha.” Forget the unnecessary pickup artist seduction games.
Connect with women through leadership.Continue reading >>
What I’ve been hearing from a lot of guys lately is a a diminished sex drive as they approach 30. I think it’s good to have a strong sex drive not just because it makes you want to have sex, but if you can harness that sexual energy, it can propel you forward in all aspects of your life, especially when it comes to meeting new women.
Exercise is great because it boosts testosterone, improves blood flow, and improves your mood. It’s hard to be movitivated (i.e. horny), when you’re in a bad mood. Also, having better blood flow means you’ll get aroused easier. You don’t have to be a gym rat, but try to get some exercise 4 times a week. It makes a huge difference.
I’ve found that a lot my sexual desire depends on my mood. Food doesn’t have an immediate drastic effect on your mood, but over time you will notice a change in energy levels and emotional well-being if you eat a balance of lean protein and low-glycemic, fibrous carbohydrates (i.e. fruits and veggies). Also make sure that you eat plenty of unsaturated fat. Olive oil, the oil in fish, animal fat, nuts, and dairy, are all great sources of good fat. Eating fat will raise your testosterone levels and improve brain function.
#3 Competition (at your level so you can win)
Joining a sports league, or some kind of competitive league keeps your mind focused on winning. It’s good to be aggressive so that you can attack problems and deal with challenges head on. Having the desire to win and be successful keeps you in the game. Don’t stress yourself out, but remember, if you are not engaged in some kind of competition on a weekly basis, it’s very easy to lose your edge in life, and with women.
#4 Don’t ejaculate
This is only relevant if you are not having regular sex. If you don’t have any women to sleep with, you should hold off on jerking off, until you find a woman. My biggest challenge has always been nerves when I first approach. What I’ve found is that the hornier I am, the less anxiety affects me when I see a woman I want to meet. If you can go for two weeks without ejaculating, you will be a monster. Nothing will get in your way from meeting women!
It’s sad to say, but most men have no idea what they are doing in bed. It’s not due to lack of intelligence or experience, but instead, a bad focus.
Men treat sex as a performance.
Ironically, it’s this focus on “performance” that makes men nervous in bed, leading to premature ejaculation or not “achieving” an erection (as if it were an achievement).
Men are very competitive, and unfortunately this competitiveness carries over into their sex lives.
I say “unfortunately” because sex, to me, is a unique opportunity to relax, let go, be in the moment, and forget yourself. This is an attitude that most men don’t share, as I’ve learned from talking to women I have been intimate with.
I’ve had a lot of clients who felt they were sexually inexperienced, and this made them nervous and insecure around women. What I explained to them was that many men with a lot of experience were still HORRIBLE in bed, even into their 40’s and 50’s.
It’s not about how many women you’ve slept with, or what freaky activities you’ve done. It’s about your attitude.
For a time, my main goal with women was to have sex with them as fast as possible. I got pretty good at it, but I quickly realized that this was ultimately unsatisfying to me.
When I had sex, it felt rushed and uncomfortable. This doesn’t make for being good in bed. Think about it – you are entering another human being, and sharing a very vulnerable, intimate side of yourself. Sure, as men, we risk very little, biologically. After all, it’s the woman that gets pregnant. The man can move on and make more babies.
But emotionally, sex is very intimate, no matter how tough of a guy you think you are. If you are treating the woman like a conquest, a “touchdown,” you will create anxiety in yourself, and sabotage a potentially amazing experience with another human being.
When you get intimate with a woman, touching her, taking her clothes off, kissing her body…say with your eyes, hands, and mouth, “I love your body. Thank you for being so beautiful.”
Learn how she likes to be touched, kissed, licked, and fucked. Pay attention to her responses, and occasionally ask her, “How does that feel? Do you like to be touched/licked/fucked harder? Softer? Slower? Faster? Here? There? Tell me what you like, woman.”
When you are inside her, penetrate her body with all your energy, all your emotion. Think about how an elite athlete – Michael Jordan, Barry Sanders, Drew Brees – penetrates, expresses himself, gives it his all. Fuck women like this. Show her who you are, and communicate your masculinity, through your hands, mouth, and dick, with full, unbridled ruthlessness. Grab her, spank her, tell her how much she turns you on. Express yourself.
In meeting and dating women, experience matters most when it’s not clear how the woman feels about you, or what she is thinking. The amateur tends to assume the worst. The pro assumes the best, but knows when there is an issue he needs to fix.
Often when a guy approaches a girl, she does not react in the most friendly way. The amateur assumes it’s because a) he did something wrong, or b) she’s a bitch. But in my experience, it’s more likely that either she, a) is simply not interested in meeting someone new, no matter how attractive he is, or b) she actually likes the guy, she just doesn’t want to show it right away. I tend to assume the second one. This way, even if I’m wrong, I don’t waste potential opportunities.
If I’m attracted to a woman, I’m very persistent, and I have enough experience to trust that she is attracted to me, even if she doesn’t show it. I know this because I’ve had enough beautiful women tell me they were attracted to me right away, even though from my perspective, it didn’t seem that way. The experienced player assumes attraction, but will also reflect on how he approached later, to see if if there’s anything he could improve next time. With experience and reflection, you can develop confidence with girls.
The amateur spends most of the conversation worried about what a woman thinks of him. In doing so, he doesn’t notice any signals the woman gives to indicate her attraction and arousal. Sometimes these signals are moments of eye contact without saying any words, or maybe she starts fidgeting and looking off into space. If I see either of these, I think, she’s turned on, and wants to take things further. Again, I’m sure I’m wrong about this occasionally, but even so, I don’t miss opportunities.
The interesting thing is, if you persist as if you knew she wanted you, it actually becomes reality. Faking confidence with girls can actually help you at first. The reason is that when you assume attraction, you behave in a more lighthearted, fun, confident way – i.e. you act attractive, thus turning her on. The pro doesn’t doubt himself in conversation. He’s relaxed because he knows she wants him (otherwise why would she still be there with you?) and instead focuses on getting to know the woman using curiosity, humor, and warmth.
This is simple. The pro has a plan, and the amateur does not. The pro plan is designed to get alone with the woman, and a pro knows when the time is right to make that move. Usually it’s on a high note, when you and the woman are sharing laughs. But it could also be when she gets quiet and aloof – often this means she is bored and wants to have sex! Who’d a thunk it?!
The amateur is nervous and fidgety when he gets a woman alone. He hesitates, and she sees this, and it turns her off. This only makes the situation worse because now she seems uninterested, hurting the amateur’s confidence even more. A pro makes his move slowly and confidently. He doesn’t rush, because he knows he can have her when he wants. He savors the moment, and when he chooses, he moves in, kisses her, caresses her, and tells her things that make her feel sexy. He has no fear, because he knows he’s making her feel wonderful, so he has nothing to worry about. When this is how you operate, then you know you truly have confidence with girls.Continue reading >>
It was tough deciding whether to make this tip #1 or #2…
The reason why I picked this to be #2 is because it’s a technique with three steps, instead of just one (but it’s still super simple).
Once you make the big shift from trying to BE confident, to GIVING confidence to others…
The next step is to make your move in a way that she will NEVER reject.
I’ll show you how…
Not only will she not reject it, she will be excited that you made a move…
And will probably want to jump your bones as soon as you do!
As I mentioned in the last message, you’ll need to focus on asking questions that reveal her unique personality.
You’ll need to focus on asking questions that reveal her unique personality.
Here are some of my favorites:
*Note: If she gives a short answer, simply follow up with, “Why” or “How come?”
You will APPRECIATE her response VERBALLY.
AS YOU SAY THIS, gently touch her with the palm-side of your hand on her forearm, or lightly cup her elbow, just for a second. You can also touch her on her back.
This sets the tone for getting physical, and immediately prevents you from EVER going into the friend zone…while making her see you as a potential romantic partner.
Now I have a FOOL-PROOF sequence you will use to touch her to lead up to your first kiss. But not just a boring, goodnight kiss. I mean a passionate, movie-moment kiss where she will want you to carry her to the bedroom and ravish her.
But before I give you that sequence I need to give you one more tip about eye contact. See, you can use eye contact to spark a woman’s curiosity about you and get her to really focus on you, no matter who else is around.
Combined with the other tips, this makes you UNSTOPPABLE with just about any woman you meet. It’s a super-simple trick that I will teach you in the next article (I’ll shoot you another email alert so you know where to find it once it’s up).
Also, as we move forward, I want you to notice how simple everything I teach you is. All my material is based on fundamentals.
I believe if you are confused about what to do with women you’ve probably been given some BAD information. In fact most dating advice for guys is either
I have a few more tips for you, to get you more action with women than you’ve ever had before…and probably more than you ever thought was possible for a single guy!
So stay tuned –
There’s a huge misconception when it comes to meeting and dating women: the hottest women are the hardest to approach. This is simply not true. In my experience, the most beautiful women have been the most responsive. This is not because I’m especially good-looking or rich, or charming. It’s because I went for it, and I was honest.
An exceptionally attractive woman lives in a strange reality. Every other woman she meets secretly hates her, and every man wants to sleep with her. And sinse most men are insecure about their own attractiveness they act fake in order to impress attractive women.
So she has men acting fake, and women being fake.
It’s no wonder that the first thing hot women look for when they are approached is sincerity and authenticity – honesty. I know this from personal experience, and through feedback I’ve gotten from women. The number one thing women tell me they first noticed about me is that I was very warm and I seemed “real.” I was just being me.
I know it’s hard to believe, but this is how you can separate yourself from all the other guys, especially with the hottest women. Again, hot women are so used to men acting fake and weird that by just being normal, honest, and friendly, you will look very impressive. After all, women don’t need a man to entertain them. They need a strong leader who cares about them.
Women can tell when you are being inauthentic. It comes across in subtle ways – evasive eye contact, talking too fast, trying too hard to be funny, standing with an awkward posture, etc. Another way men try to talk to hot women is by acting cocky, overly confident, to hide their insecurity and nervousness.
It’s interesting – I’ve actually told women – HOT women – that I was nervous talking to them. And it actually seemed to relax them and make them more open to getting to know me. Why? Because I was being real, being honest, and remember – that’s what the hottest women are looking for. That’s what allwomen are looking for.
Be honest, be warm, take the lead. Even if you’re nervous. Because the number one regret all men have is that they didn’t go for that one beautiful girl. If only they knew how easy it could be!Continue reading >>
If you know how to turn a girl on, you can sleep with her, no matter how beautiful she is. If you don’t know how to turn a girl on, nothing you have or do will make a difference. She won’t sleep with you.
Women know how to turn men on, but men don’t know to turn women on.
Most common MO is to emulate what women do by being pretty,
try to be alpha, be funny,
sound smart, brag, be really sweet and complimentary
Basically impressing/courting, hoping she’ll give him the green light Alcohol
Plus men don’t know how women think about sex – what a woman’s experience is
most men, except for 1%, are actually telling women NOT to be sexual (otherwise get punished)
by courting, through seduction or chivalry
By trying to get sex from her, by undermining her innate sexuality, and instead using game you are telling her that you are in the frame of women=possessions, and thus her value diminishes if she fucks you
Realization of my problem
It took me several months to have sex with my first girlfriend, and after she dumped me, I went a long dry spell. I went on dates, spent money, tried my best to impress the woman, but it never went anywhere.
Several friends of mine – not good looking guys, but reasonably cool and fun guys, had the oppositi results
They would fuck women they just met without dates or spending money, or trying very hard.
I decided to fix my problem and tried a lot of things. I tried to escalate using seduction techniques,
And i met a lot of women, trying tons of things.
On dates, I tried to spend litle money, as I was broke, and didn’t actually want to date, I wanted sex.
I managed to get a fuckbuddy that helped me increase my sexual confidence,
And i started noticing that my escalation was happening faster, so it was possible to learn this
I started reading a lot of books on female psychology, and started realizing that women like sex too
I noticed that the more money I spent, the less likely a woman was to sleep with me
the faster I got a woman to my place, the faster we’d have sex, even if she said she was “being good” –
I would just keep talking and doing kino and then going in for the kiss, then not stopping
I found that it wasn’t women who were afraid of sex, it was me. Often I would realize after the fact that I could have made a move, that she was open, probably horny, and it was my fear of doing the wrong thing or coming off creepy that was holding me back, on top of my lack of sexual confdidence from real experience, which was changing with the couple FBs i had
I also realized that it was being sweet, chivarlous – paying for shit basically, being a gentleman and not being sexual out of “respect”
and going on dates – focusing on the date, was when women would be more hesitant to come over, lose interest, not call back, etc.
This started a journey that is too long and complex to go into, but over the past 8 years I’ve been moving more away from courtship and more towards friendship which may sound weird bc of the friendzone, but i am friends with women and fuck them and it works out very well – the sex is better, we are more open and honest outside the bedroom, and i feel a real connection, not another conquest. Of course i’m not monogamous and they know this -sometimes they get mad, but quickly get over it because they miss the sex, the bond, and having a strong, smart, sexy man they can be themselves with, and it’s appreciated and encouraged.
A woman will have sex with you if she thinks she will enjoy it, not because you are handsome, funny, or rich. As you are turned on by a woman’s body, she is turned on by your mind. How a man thinks determines his success, quality of life, and how he makes others feel. Your ability to satisfy a woman in bed depends not on your size, stamina, or technique, but how you express your thoughts about her. Women intuit this from the moment they meet you.
Making a woman horny is not a random, complicated, or mysterious process. It’s not a process at all. Women are already horny, just as you are already horny. You don’t walk around with a hard-on all day, but you have a baseline sexual desire, naturally inherent to you, and all healthy humans, including women.
There is a general misconception that women are less sexual and horny than men. Many men accept this idea, despite a mountain of evidence supporting it’s antithesis. Sadly, the study of female sexuality is still in its infancy. But over it’s short life-span, serious inquiry into female sexuality has overturned many paradigms, assumed and accepted without any academic rigor critical analysis supporting them.
Some myths about female sexuality:
Women have sex in return for commitment and resources (instead of pure pleasure).
The fundamental problem is miscommunication and misunderstanding, stemming from Confirmation Bias, Conservatism Bias and Social Desirability Bias. Without going into the pathetic history of ignorance, oppression, and persecution “civilization” has inflicted on women, rather than appreciating and understanding them as human beings, suffice to say, conventional wisdom AND science have both failed women, and in doing so, failed men, who remain in the dark, sexually frustrated, resorting to Game (Deception).
Several factors create the illusion of the asexual female:
1. A woman’s value as a human being is determined by how few sexual partners she has had. If she is judged as promiscuous, or “easy” (as if she is weak foe in a battle), she loses social value. So even though she is horny, she must hide this from society, from any man she likes, and from herself, by detaching from her sexuality, and repressing sexual thoughts as they only serve to frustrate her in a world that punishes female desire. She feels horny, but must hide it.
2. All women have experienced sexual trauma. It’s common for a woman to have been molested, raped, or nearly raped at least once in her life. I don’t know one woman without a disturbing experience. In general, women are leered at, here vulgar comments from strange men, and groped. Every woman has felt pressure to have sex before she is ready, by a guy she thought liked and cared about her. In high school, and even college, if a woman has sex with a guy, he will brag (or word will somehow get out) and she will gain a reputation as a slut, as easy, as dirty…for doing something she is wired to do, that felt good, and was a way to feel closer to a guy she liked and thought liked her. You may not have known about these COMMON female experiences, but you can understand why women are bit apprehensive about getting alone with a guy they just met, and tend to put the breaks on throughout the sexual process.
3. As the gender investing more in reproduction, women see sex more like an investment. The risk is getting impregnated by a man who will disappear after he gets what he wants. The baby grows inside her body, not yours. That’s a big deal, but it also illustrates how horny women are. They still have sex despite the risk. I wonder if men would be a little more cautious about jumping in bed with a woman if there was a 50% chance of the man getting pregnant.
4. Most men are BAD in bed, according to what I’ve been told by every woman I’ve asked (a lot). This is because men don’t understand what turns a woman on. It’s not what you see in porn. Do women like to be fucked, pounded, spanked, choked, and slapped? Yes to all, but only if done in the right way, and only in conjunction with other aspects of sex, which I will explain. If you’ve never had sushi, and someone offers to buy you a sushi dinner, you won’t be that excited, even if though the meal is free. But once you have sushi, and you like it, sushi becomes more tempting. In her mind, the odds that sex with you will be worth the time, logistical complications are not great.
This is what you are facing when you meet a new woman you want to sleep with. Combine her sexual cynicism with the first 3 factors, and you have a situation requiring YOU to communicate that she will LOVE getting fucked by you.
Women want sex just as much, if not more, than men. But they have a dimension of anxiety in their sexuality that men don’t have. This anxiety is perceived as disinterest, so men use tricks (seduction), bartering (paying for dates), and even force (rape, or emotional manipulation) to GET sex FROM her body, in SPITE of her mind. Ironically, they are waging battle against a foe – her disinterest or disliking of sex – that doesn’t exist. In doing so, they ignore the ambiguity of fear and desire women feel about sleeping with a new man.
So a more useful articulation of our goal is to say “how to turn a woman on TO YOU,” and magnifying her arousal that it outweighs her fear. I will give you a general strategy for directing a woman’s innate sexuality towards you, and then give you 3 simple yet powerful tactics to trigger dripping wet lust in the next woman you meet, and a bonus tactic to blow her mind in bed.
It all begins with your desire. Your desire is the key to triggering her desire.
My entire teaching is about turning women on – making them feel good. To be a master of this, requires a bit of education, guidance, and experience – covered totally in SS, and demonstrated live in coaching.
Belief about women
The first order of business to learning how to turn a girl on is to get comfortable with your sexual desire. Think about what you want to do to a beautiful woman. You want to touch her, fuck her, watch and feel her suck your dick. That’s GOOD. She wants to do that stuff too. You must believe this. Read Nancy Friday’s “My Secret Garden” and “The Hite Report,” to internalize women’s inherent sexuality. You’ll be absolutely shocked. Society and girls themselves do just about everything in their power to hide it – but women are absolutely crazy about sex.
Belief about yourself
You can’t feel like you are getting over on women when yu have sex with them. You must feel like you are giving them a good experience. You must be proud of your dick. women like your body – your hands, your mouth, and especially your dick. If you think you are sneaking a dirty part of your body into women, you must change this by reminding yoruself that women love dick, and that part of YOU, is designed to pleasure HER. You are built to turn a girl on.
If you get your body, style, and hair and facial hair style together, you will be good-looking enough. Once you do, simply wanting a girl makes you valuable to her. She wants to get fucked. Women want men to desire them. Your desire IS your value – to turn a girl on, she must feel your desire.
Don’t be smooth on opener, show your body – neck, inside of arms and hands, eyes and mouth, smell her, look her in convo – hair and neckline EC, sticky eyes
Set a precedent
comfort with sexual desire – show desire, set sexual precedent until you are ok going direct with a strong sexual vibe. Then you can open other ways. But this is the foundation – if you practice nonsexual opening, it will be hard to shift gears, and you’ll always get shitty results until you fix this. this is why you are talking to her, and if you can’t own that and feel good about it, you’re being a liar and a coward, and you are NOT doing the one primary thing that turns women on – being desired. She gets aroused when she feels desired. that’s why men are usually the initiators. she’s just waiting for you – she’s receptive. Even if you move before she’s ready, just back off. Knowing that you desire her will get her horny. Again, being horny isn’t enough for a woman to have sex – they have an extra factor of anxiety we don’t have.
Identity – comfort with being sexual – requires you show it, and get feedback
Set the frame
Be prepared to talk about yourself. Let her learn about you in small chunks, but honest chunks. This way, there is always more to you, and that turns women on. At the same time, you are always expressing your passion for life, for your goals and ambitions. That’s the other exciting thing to women. Passion+Intrigue+Mastery=horny woman.
“What was that like?”
“What’s your favorite? Why?”
“How do you think about ___? What excites you?”
“How do you relax your body after a hard workout?”
“What’s the most sensitive part of your body?”
“Where do you like to be touched? Kissed?”
Body mind balance
Non judgment story
Statements: Resonant sexual expression – describe ambition in sexual way:Q
Questions and escalation: What makes a man good in bed: passion, comfort with sex/non judgmental, playful-light-relaxed-patient, attentive- questions good hands and eyes
Elicit mind, reward body
Kiss – another article, but if you do this stuff, she’ll give you a huge window
Foreplay – another article
BJ – anothehr article
Simple techniques, leading to blowjob
Proceptivity switch: Give body, reward mind
Creating barriers to having sex, that are easily overcome by the woman, are powerful magnifiers of the pre-existing sexual tension.
Telling a woman she is too much of a good girl for you (you’re a bad man), or that she is a bad girl but she has to hide it give her a context to push against. Women love to rebel. They are rebels. Theyve been repressed and controlled for eons. You are the context for her to be wild, free, bad, naughty, dirty. She WANTS TO.
Resolve with Permission
Make sure women know they can be “naughty” with you. In fact, use “naughty” “bad” and “dirty” with women as part of your vocabulary. Say these words, always framing the rest of society as oppressing her, and you wanting to be naughty, bad, and dirty.
Always encourage her sexual expression in a warm, encouraging way.
Sexual Resonance Language
Ever had a girl say some hot shit to you and you couldn’t hold back anymore? Same deal with women – what you say has a bigger impact on her orgasms than any technical or mechanics. you want to use words that she udnerstands because that’s how SHE experiences it – you are speaking her language.
Some words to use:
Fill, hard, wet, take, split, FOR YOU-YOU DO THIS TO ME, Inclusion language, coach her – “that’s my bad girl – show me how much you like that dick.”
Let her feel your arousal
You’re hardness is the best compliment she can get. Don’t press up her on the dancefloor with a hard on. Walk up to her, and make sure she wants to dance with you, then let yourself grow hard for HER.
Women love to feel your hard-on, as long as they think it is specifically for THEM. So always make sure you present your dick as a specific response to that particular woman.
your desire turns her on. Your desire for her is exciting to her – for a woman, feeling sexy, in the eyes of a man, is the ultimate turn-on.
once you can open with sexual interest, you can open situationally, but instead of it falling flat or being boring, there will be a spark
Ongoing – know your woman
Learn about her as an individual – every woman is unique.Continue reading >>
I’m going to keep this article simple. It’s about asking personal questions to women, for a romantic intention. You see, most guys ask a series of boring-ass questions hoping that at some point, the women will just drop her panties and have sex. How many questions do you have to ask before this happens? Infinity.
Here’s how you really do it. You need to ask questions that get women talking about themselves. When she does this, you can escalate (by touching her or inviting her to hang out with you) as a reward. This timing, her effort-your reward, creates the perception that you are the sexual prize she is trying to win over. This is the dynamic you need to turn a woman on and keep control in your relationship.
Here’s a list of great questions to spice up your conversations and get women talking.
What would you do if?
What if you were on a desert island and could only have one book?
What would you do to occupy your mind until the day you died?
What’s your favorite?
What’s your favorite character trait?
What’s your favorite food to eat?
What’s your favorite part of a man’s body?
What’s your favorite part of your body to be kissed and sucked?
What do you NOT want?
What turns you off when you meet a guy?
What makes you distrust people?
What do you dislike about yourself?
What would disappoint you most if you had a child?
What makes you smile and laugh?
What do you want to do for income, eventually?
What is your favorite funny TV show/movie?
What’s your favorite joke?
How do you remember to not take life too seriously?Which friend makes you laugh the most? Why?
What makes you angry and motivated?
What’s your biggest pet peeve?
What’s the angriest you’ve ever been?
Who do you hate the most?
Have you ever felt so angry that you had to prove yourself?
What drives you?
What’s your passion?
What world-crisis pisses you off enough to make you act?
Think about the common theme underlying all these questions. They are all designed to get someone thinking. The good news is that women love to talk about themselves, and explore how their minds work. When you can get a woman to look inside her mind and explore her own personality, she’ll love you. The reason for this? Women are culturally conditioned to think about everyone else more than themselves. So when you open her up to herself, she feels like she’s exploring a new universe. It’s because of you – your own curiosity.
The very act of exploring a woman mentally is just as erotic to her as exploring her body. The nature of a woman is to want to be wanted. So when you show your interests in her personality, her very nature as a woman gets “lit up.” If you’re a man, and she’s a woman, this “light up” in terms of her being attended to and explored, turns her on. In other words, she gets wet when you are curious about her. This is why your attention/curiosity is your strongest tool when it comes to meeting and attracting women.Continue reading >>
A good portion of my clients are shorter than average. It’s no secret that women prefer taller men, but this does not have to stop you. I’ve taught many guys to pick up women taller than them!
It all comes down to having a strong physical presence by adjusting your posture and body movement. There is a lot of advice out there about how to have confident body language, but most of it is vague, or simply wrong. Here’s what really works (and as always, this is field-tested by myself, and clients I’ve taught).
Most guys move through the world accommodating everyone else. They don’t own their space, and move faster than is truly comfortable for them. Another major problem I see when guys approach women is their lack of effective eye contact.
It’s rare to see a woman standing still, waiting for a man to approach her. At a bar or club, women stand in groups, flanked by friends, or blocked by the bar. During the day, women are either walking or sitting, making it difficult to walk right up to them.
The problem with this is that the ideal way to approach a woman is by having her see you and lock eyes with you before you speak. In this article, I’ll teach you how to get a woman’s total attention – you become her entire world – without saying a word.
There are four easy ways to make your presence felt, and get her to think, “Who is this guy???”
1. Lead with your lower body. This is something you see with very sexual guys do, as well as professional fighters (e.g. UFC/MMA guys). Use your pelvis as your guiding point. Most men lead with their chest, arms, shoulders, or head. Stand up straight, push your pelvis forward, spread your legs to shoulder length, and lead with your dick!
2. Stay unprotected by exposing your front. Imagine opening the entire front of your body, exposing your whole body to her. Keep your arms relaxed at your sides. If she wanted to punch you in the gut, or kick you in the balls, you’d be totally vulnerable. This shows incredible confidence.
3. Smile with your eyes. This may sound strange, but most guys either smile with their mouths, or simply look apprehensive. Try sending a warm, loving message from your eyes into hers, the same way your eyes would light up if you saw a cute puppy.
4. Move slow. As you approach her, take your time. You are in your own world, and you’re about to bring her in. This shows that you move on YOUR schedule, and you have no fear of rejection. Ironically, fear of rejection makes it more likely, whereas being comfortable with rejection makes it less likely. Do this by walking up to her as if you know she wants you to.
No matter your size or body type, you can turn a woman on without saying a word. Of course, at some point you’ll have to talk, but when you have a great physical presence, whatever you say will sound confident and cool.Continue reading >>
Meeting women in college
I would give anything to go back in time to my college days. I missed so many opportunities because I didn’t know then what I know now. But that’s life. I’m not regretful – my life only gets better as I grow older.
But looking back on college, I realize that was probably the easiest it will ever be to get laid. If you are in college, take full advantage. You are surrounded by opportunities, that you probably won’t recognize until after the fact. Let me help you out.
Although it may seem obvious and cliche, using the commonalities you share with other students is the easiest, and thus the best way to connect with girls in college. This is what the “naturals” understand. You don’t have to be fancy or original. Just be social and friendly. Class is the reason everyone is in college, and it’s something you can use to meet girls.
In class, be friendly to everyone. Make friends with as many people as you can. Talk to the people next to you. Ask them how they did on their exam, or if they understood the homework. Crack a joke about the class or professor. Just get an interaction going. Gradually build friendships over time – don’t rush in and try to get a girl’s number in the first week of class. Take your time. If you make your move too early, things could get awkward. Wait until the middle of the semester, and keep your focus on making lots of friends rather than zeroing in on one girl.
Studying for a test is the easiest way to meet a girl outside of class. Usually, groups of students will meet at the library to study. Participate! It will never be this easy again. It’s a no-brainer to get some late-night pizza after a group study session, and invite a girl back to your dorm to chill and watch a movie.
Which brings me to dorm life. For some guys, living in the dorms is one long orgy. The key is to not try to hit on girls, but to be social and have a good room to hang out in.
A good dorm room means:
A couch/futon/bed that people can kick back on. Also have some other chairs if you’re going to have a lot of people over at once.
Have a decent TV, and sound system, and make sure you have a big variety of music on your computer.
Although I don’t advocate underage drinking, having some drinks is always good, because let’s face – college kids like to drink. Just don’t get too crazy, and make sure your RA doesn’t catch you.
Also have some wall decorations, and mellow lighting – Christmas lights are cool – green or yellow make a nice cozy glow for the room.
Think cozy, comfortable, and equipped. Leave your door wide open, play music, and invite people to come by. Then just kick back and be friendly to everyone! Girls who like you will stay behind after everyone leaves, and then it’s just a matter of sitting next to her and going for the kiss.
I really blew it in college. I went to so many parties where all I had to do was talk to girls in a nice, relaxed way, and I could’ve easily hooked up. The key is to initiate conversation without being too forward or creepy. Don’t use lines. Just say, “Hey. What’s your name?” And that’s it. Ask her what she’s studying.
Don’t be that guy in the corner getting wasted. Say Hi, and introduce yourself to people (guys too!). Once you are talking to a girl at a party, there will be a point where you should try to get her alone – in a bedroom or maybe somewhere outside. Take her by the hand and go for the kiss. College girls are already horny-out-of-their-minds. Add a little alcohol, and a cool, relaxed guy with the balls to approach, and she is READY TO GO.